Chapter 118 Triggering Memories
"I see." He commented.
"Well it wasn't like that at first," she closed her eyes at the painful thought rushing in.
"What do you mean?" He inched closer to her, hopeful that she could explain to his understanding.
"You need a strong emotion to trigger the memory, and well mine was the drive to find out who had killed my brother."
'That's almost the same drive as mine.' Nix furrowed his brows at what could have gone wrong with his.
If he could tap into the memory of his mother, it would have been enough of a cheat he needed to know whoever she had worked for and all who were in the scroll-like he was watching the feed from a CCTV, and in turn, know who he was up against.
He shook his head, he was at a disadvantage, wondering when he could get that privilege of getting such a connection.
"When you said you wanted to know who killed your brother, you meant you wanted revenge, right?" He asked, curious as to the reason she had been able to access hers.
Lumina raised her brow at his comment, shaking her head and having a crooked smile. "I wouldn't hide the fact that I did feel that way in those first few months I had been in the academy. Keeping a secret like that isn't all that simple."
She could remember that as being the one thing that caused most of her rampage. The fear of experiencing death at the hands of someone made her guard increase to an unfathomable level.
Determined not to be killed by anyone's hand, she would rather find some sort of way out of her life-threatening situation than being killed and if she hadn't been stopped by Fae, she knew how many she would have killed because of the situation she had been put in.
Arion was an example that she hoped wouldn't repeat itself, the next person wouldn't be so lucky.
"In other words, you're trying to say it's not fueled by revenge," Nix interjected, confused as to what else could be the reason for her wanting to know who had caused all of these.
She nodded her head with a smile. "When I was blinded by revenge, I acted on my little knowledge on what was at stake." She got up and went to the table to get a piece of paper and a pen.
Sitting back on the floor, she slapped the paper on the ground and in between them.
Drawing a circle, with two arrows on it which showed it in a cycle. In the middle of the circle were the words she penned down– Revenge.
"This is the one thing that I had gotten from my brother when he was still alive and with us back home." She smiled at the fond memory.
When she was little, he had drawn this circle numerous times when she had been mocked by the kids in the neighborhood for not possessing a gift like her brother.
As a kid, she had been hyperactive and had been affected by the words they had used to refer to her. In retaliation, she had caused little disasters to befall each of them. It could be planting a hornet's nest in the city's playground, and creating traps by digging holes with a ruse covering where she knew they trod daily.
Notorious for every trick, she had been blacklisted by the children's parents and ostracized by the neighborhood.
Her smile only broadened at the thought of what she had gone through as a little girl.
"My brother had caught me sitting on a boy with a knife aimed at his neck..."
"You were daring even as a kid." Nix was shocked at her words.
"I guess it's always been there." She shrugged, "could I continue?"
Bowing in apology, he brought out his hand, gesturing that she could continue.
"I had been pulled off just in time before I had slit his throat." She made a slit throat gesture, her eyes a little crazed as she spoke.
Nix pushed back himself from where he sat. Uncomfortable with the way she had acted while relating the story.
"What the hell could that boy have done that would warrant that?" He shivered at the thought.
Even when he was little, he didn't have such tendencies. This only made him want to be more cautious when he would be dealing with her.
He could recall her retaliation on Christmas tree when he had tried to stab her when she was distracted; if she wasn't convinced by Fae, he would have been dead at her hands.
"Simple, he rained curses and most especially one stating my family was better off dead as our father had abandoned us."
Nix's face suddenly turned sad. Her words had hit him deep, this was something he could actively sympathize with as he was abandoned by both parents at his birth.
Bullied by this in the orphanage, he had always questioned why he was born. But in all of this, he had tried to maintain a positive mindset, hoping things would be better than it was.
"That doesn't still justify killing him, you could have just beaten him black and blue!" Nix suggested with a straight face.
"Black and blue? Why and how would I do that?" She questioned in confusion at the sort of words he speaks at times.
'Again? You can't comprehend my simple normal human words in my world?!' He deadpanned in his thoughts.
"I meant to beat him till he was bruised all over." He clarified.
"Oh!" She had a devilish grin on her lips at the understanding. "Well, I did beat him black and blue before I attempted to kill him for those unforgiving words."
"Eyes on the paper, pretty face. Eyes on the paper, you aren't done with the main point of drawing this circle." He stressed, tapping his hand on the paper to bring her back to reality for a moment.