Chapter 141 - TWENTY TWO: Uncomfortable Arrangements
I love you.
The words sounded so different coming from Dash's lips than when they had come from the emperor's.
Like an entirely different language.
Kel's heart wasn't pounding, and her stomach wasn't filled with butterflies. Rather, a pang of emptiness stung her chest while her stomach tied itself into a knot.
"It doesn't matter if you don't love me right now," Dash said softly, as if he already guessed Kel's reaction. "We have a whole lifetime together, so you can take your time."
Kel blinked in surprise.
"A whole lifetime?" she questioned, pulling away from Dash.
Every time Kel tried to seriously picture her future, she became overwhelmed with unshakeable dejection. The only way to keep herself from getting swallowed by the poignant feeling of loss was to keep her thoughts focused solely on the parched lands of Tael.
But Dash, apparently, had planned everything out. Was he even going to abandon Mevani for her? Or did he plan to find a way to eventually bring her back there?
"I'm the only one who can protect you now, Kel," Dash explained with somber eyes. "You can rely on me just as you always have, and I'll take care of you."
Kel shook her head. "I appreciate what you've done for m-"
Wait. Did she appreciate what he'd done for her?
He'd remained in Serin, by his own ambiguous explanation, to prevent the emperor's suspicions that she was a fake. But that was after he'd blindly betrayed her in the first place.
When the true princess's whereabouts were finally published across the continent, Dash made sure Kel was far away from the reaches of both the Dragon Emperor and the king of Mevani. But did she even need to run away?
It was beginning to seem more and more like Dash didn't actually have Kel's best interest in mind. Instead, it was as if he'd planned everything according to his own selfish desires to monopolize her.
Chills suddenly ran down Kel's spine as she peered into Dash's pointed green gaze.
He said he loved her, but she still had too many questions.
Since when had he no longer thought of her as his younger sister?
And why was he so insistent that the entire world was against her except for him?
How could she even trust that he was telling her the truth?
Later, the same doubts swirled through her mind as she knelt opposite Dash at the small grungy table to eat a plain but generous dinner. Nesta had even gone so far as to use some spices from her precious store for the occasion.
"You know, you're always welcome to come stay with us here," Nesta smiled at Dash, scooping another heap of porridge onto his wooden plate. "Isn't that right, Harrow?"
"Yeah, sure," Harrow agreed gruffly. "There's always use for a pair of strong hands around here."
"I appreciate the offer," Dash nodded, "but I can't stay for long. There's somewhere else I have to go soon."
"Somewhere else you have to go?" Kel paused with her spoon halfway to her mouth.
"Ah.." Dash's eyebrows knit together.
The air between them had grown strange after Dash's second love confession, and they hadn't gotten around to discussing his plans.
Kel hadn't expected him to stay for long. No, it was better if he didn't stay. That way, she wouldn't have to think about the exhausting worries that seemed to plague her whenever Dash was near.
"Well, if you need to go soon, it's best for you to rest up tonight," Nesta spoke up, grabbing both the empty porridge pot and Harrow's nearly-empty plate. "You two finish eating and then head to bed."
"Yeah, sure," Harrow repeated callously, following Nesta to the wash basin. "We'll take care of these dishes."
"Leave the dishes to me," Dash insisted, rising to his feet.
"No, no," Nesta refused. "You just get some sleep."
"Alright…" Dash trailed off glancing toward the hall.
The house only had two tiny rooms, one for the old couple and one that Kel now occupied. Whenever Dash came, Nesta usually spread some spare blankets in the main room for him as a makeshift bed.
Of course, he wouldn't be able to sleep with the couple still occupying the space while they cleaned.
"Oh!" Nesta's eyebrows shot up as she realized Dash's hesitancy. "I figured you and Kel could just share his bed tonight."
"There's no way we can share," Kel immediately interjected, carrying her own plate over to the basin.
"Don't be like that, child," Nesta clicked her tongue, whacking Kel's head with the sopping wooden spoon in her hands. "Your friend came all the way here to see you, and he's awful tired."
"I'll just sleep in here, and he can have my room," Kel mumbled, backing out of reach of Nesta's spoon.
"No, Kel. That will be too uncomfortable for you," Dash spoke up. "I'll sleep here like usual, so you can go to your room."
Kel's mouth gaped.
Too uncomfortable? A house with a roof and blankets?
Had he forgotten that she was also a soldier and had spent many nights sleeping on the cold ground under the open sky?
His comment made her even more determined.
"I'll just go sleep on the hay pile in the stable," Kel smirked. "That should be nice and comfy."
Bam!
Nesta's authoritative spoon found Kel's head again before anyone could respond to her snide remark.
"How can you be such a spoiled brat at this age?" the old woman demanded. "Now you take that young man and tuck the both of you into bed. Got it?"
"Yes ma'am," Kel grumbled, rubbing the bump left by the merciless spoon.
She and Dash had slept near each other plenty of times as soldiers in the same squad, but they hadn't shared a bed since they were children. Perhaps, she could survive the night if she just thought of it the same as it was back then.
With Dash's broad shoulders and muscular frame and her own unchildlike features, however, she doubted just pretending they were kids again would save her from the awkwardness awaiting.
And unfortunately, she was right.