QT: Don't fall in love with the Male Lead

Chapter 21: Don't experience character bleed

Xi Zirui looks at Han Yu from beneath the fan of his long lashes, and tries to summon the kind of cold detachment he definitely isn't feeling.

"I told you once, you don't impress me," he swallows down around the tightness in his throat and looks away from Han Yu.

He hears Han Yu gasp, and feels his fingers close around his elbow. "Didi what-"

Han Yu's voice sounds small and wounded, so unlike his usual confident swagger, that it almost makes Xi Zirui turn around to face him.

"We're about to start filming," Xi Zirui says, shaking his arm free of Han Yu's grip.

Han Yu startles at the suddenness of Xi Zirui's movements.

He opens his mouth as if he's going to say something, but Liao Min calls everyone to their marks and his rebuttal never makes it past his lips.

---

Filming is torture. Xi Zirui has to endure take on take of Han Yu's slim chest pressed against his back, and his broad palms on his waist, guiding him through the techniques Xiu Xianren teaches Hai Yaomei.

It doesn't escape Xi Zirui that hey have touched each other much more intimately, and he never felt this overwhelmed.

Now he's overly conscious of all the places where their bodies meet, even through several layers of robes.

Liao Min's directorial asides don't help matters. "Han Yu, hold on to him tighter, you want to teach him, yes, but seduce him too."

And, "These scenes serve two different purposes for Xiu Xianren, teaching Hai Yaomei an alternative way to control the demonic energy, and make him realize that the two of them together would be a good thing."

Han Yu, usually quick with a joke and a smart quip that would send the crew around them into a fit of laughter, only hums stoically and follows Liao Min's directions without question.

It hurts Xi Zirui to think he's to blame for that glazed off look in Han Yu's eyes.

For his part, he has no problem embodying Hai Yaomei's chaotic state of mind. For once, he's never felt closer to the character he's playing.

"Host is doing very well, very focused. The Male Lead is clearly disappointed about being rejected, but Host can see this as an opportunity to grow closer to the Second Male Lead," Ni Ni's encouragement rings inside his mind like nails on a chalkboard.

He tightens his lips into a tense line and focuses on delivering his lines to Liao Min's standards.

---

They run through a dozen scenes where Hai Yaomei and Xiu Xianren dance around each other during the first part of the day. Xiu Xianren tries to get closer, bridge the distance between them, while Hai Yaomei is thorn between his desire to give in, and his duty to his own sect and his own principles.

Xi Zirui would laugh if it wasn't so depressing.

The dramatic irony of the whole thing is top notch, you really couldn't pay him to come up with something like that if he had to write the script of his own life.

"Is Host okay? His eyelid is trembling a little..." Ni Ni asks, after Xi Zirui has had to look Han Yu in the eye for the last ten takes and tell him: "the two of us, no matter what...we're incompatible", in a raw and wavering voice.

So, no, Xi Zirui is not okay.

It only gets worse when they have to run through a scene where Hai Yaomei is trying to leave and Xiu Xianren pulls him back against his chest, to whisper softly into his ear.

"I know you're scared, of what this will mean for your future and for your sect, but I'll be by your side every step of the way."

Even after the tenth time, it doesn't get any easier each time Han Yu presses those words against the shell of his ear, and hold on tight to his middle.

It might be his imagination, but he thinks each time they go through the scene, when Hai Yaomei has to swallow his emotions and pull away from Xiu Xianren, Han Yu's grip grows more intense, as if he doesn't want to let Xi Zirui go.

"That's a wrap, we'll shoot inside after lunch," Liao Min calls, giving the screens mounted near her chair one last appraising look.

Han Yu looks down at Xi Zirui from beneath his lashes, and opens his mouth as if he's going to say something, but Xi Zirui lowers his eyes and turns on his heel to leave before he can get a single word out.

They've both been through enough, now the only thing Xi Zirui wants to do is lock himself in his trailer and lick his wounds.

---

That's easier said than done, considering that Su Xueyi jogs after him as soon as he leaves the set.

"Do you want to grab lunch in town?" he asks, keeping pace with Xi Zirui's unusually long strides.

"Yes! Host, should definitely say yes, and should also spill some food down his lips during lunch. Not a lot, it should be sexy, not messy, so that Su Xueyi will say 'You have a little something~-' and then lick his thumb before cleaning Host's skin!" Ni Ni screams, almost vibrating with excitement.

Xi Zirui wants no part in the mental fanfiction she's writing so he tells Su Xueyi outright, "I have a headache I'll have some microwave noodles and take a nap."

"Oh, sure," Su Xueyi says, crestfallen. "Do you want me to bring you some takeout?"

"No it's fine, the headache is more like a migraine honestly, and it's making me a little nauseous." Much like this entire day.

He stops just outside the trailer's door and gives Su Xueyi one last apologetic smile. "I'm just going to sleep to see if it helps get rid of it, and I'll eat something afterwards."

Su Xueyi nods, his hands shoved inside the pockets of his tight fitting pants. "You're sure you'll be okay on your own?" he nods with his chin towards Xi Zirui's bandaged wrists.

Xi Zirui gets into the trailer and waves goodbye over his shoulder. "Don't worry about me, go rest too, have some fun."

He doesn't notice the frown twisting Su Xueyi's handsome features when he closes the door behind him.

Xi Zirui leans with his back against the door, and with a sigh lets himself slide to the floor.

"Why is Host not trying to grow closer to the Second Male Lead? If things continue on this path then--"

He has heard enough from Ni Ni to last him for an entire lifetime, right now everything Xi Zirui wants is some peace and quiet.

"Ni Ni, fuck off," he says, and her words cut off into abrupt silence.

Xi Zirui was lying when he told Su Xueyi he had a migraine but now he really thinks he can feel one building up behind his right eye.

Dragging himself to the narrow cot, he falls face first into the clean sheets and hugs the cold pillow to his face, blocking out all the light in the small trailer.

---

The muffled sound of someone having a conversation outside his door rouses him from his light doze.

"Sorry to bother you Manager Li," Su Xueyi says, clearly speaking on the phone. "Xi laoshi is still sleeping and won't open the door, I was wondering if you could bring the trailer's key?"

There's silence as Li Siqi answers Su Xueyi, and then he says, "Right, thank you, I'll meet you there."

He disconnects, and Xi Zirui thinks he's going to walk away from the trailer to meet Li Siqi wherever she is.

Instead he calls someone else. "It's me, yes, things are still strained between them, you'll get what you want," he sounds a little disdainful about that.

The person on the other end of the line says something else and Su Xueyi scoffs. "Not likely, I haven't been making progress, these days he avoids me like the plague."

Is he talking about Xi Zirui? He stays really quiet and tries to pay more attention to the conversation, but he realizes Su Xueyi's voice is growing distant. He's walking away from the trailer.

The last thing Xi Zirui hears is a garbled. "At least it makes what we're doing easier-" before distance completely muffles the sound of his voice.

Who was Su Xueyi talking with?

Su Xueyi will be back any minute, most likely, but Xi Zirui needs to clear this up first.

"Ni Ni wake up," he says, whispering hurriedly into his wrist.

"Oh, now Host wants to hear from Ni Ni," she says, her voice dripping with derision.

Xi Zirui doesn't have time for her sass. "Who was Su Xueyi talking with just now, outside the trailer?"

"How is Ni Ni supposed to know that?"

"Aren't you and advanced AI system, thing...don't you know everything about this world, and whatnot?" Xi Zirui asks, his frustration mounting.

"Why is Host so nervous? Has the Second Male Lead developed feelings for someone else?"

As if he'd care about that! Sometimes talking with Ni Ni feels like trying to light matches underwater.

"He was talking to someone else about me!" At least he's pretty sure he was. Him and Han Yu, who else could he be referring to with 'things are still strained between them'.

Su Xueyi would get that impression, from witnessing Xi Zirui's interactions with Han Yu in public, during filming. He has no idea about their moments alone in his hotel room, or about the text messages.

Su Xueyi's interest he can understand, if he has feelings for Xi Zirui, but why would someone else care about that?

"He said something about 'at least it makes what we're doing easier'" Xi Zirui says, hoping extra information will make Ni Ni tell him something useful at last.

She goes quiet for a long time, but eventually says, in a tinny voice. "This is very bad."

That's exactly what Xi Zirui was thinking too.

"Elaborate!" he hisses, keeping an ear out for the sound of jangling keys.

"This world is supposed to have a very charming romance about missed chances, and teenage love finally being reciprocated years later, as well as forgiveness and redemption," Ni Ni says drawing out the words as if she's trying to make excuses for what she's about to say next.

"Hurry up," Xi Zirui urges, at the end of his rope already.

"I just want to say, that maybe Host would be better prepared for these events if he hadn't turned down Ni Ni's personality settings so low when he arrived here! Low personality settings mean that Host wants a hands off approach to navigating the world, and finding out things as he goes. Other than general information, and pointing out opportunities and key events, Ni Ni really couldn't interfere much."

"Get.to.the.point." Now Xi Zirui finally understands why he was always so suspicious of AI. It was his preservation instinct warning him of the struggles to come.

"The point is that as the Love Interest in this world, the Second Male lead couldn't be perfect from the beginning, as that would be very boring, and not an interesting experience for our costumers."

Ni Ni is no closer to explaining anything, and Xi Zirui's fake migraine is now a very real one.

Suddenly, he hears the sound of keys jingling outside, and then the lock turning.

Su Xueyi stares at him, sitting up on the narrow cot and looking attentively at his wrist. "Oh, you're awake," he says, his cheeks dimpling into a deceptively sweet smile.