Playboy Cultivator in the Apocalypse

Rein grabbed Steve and jumped backward as a golden-red shooting star cut across the street, causing the entire area to warp. A split second later—

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

CRAaaaShhHSHhhhHhhHhhH!

A massive heat blast hit her, but the heat didn't last. The atmosphere became tranquil and cool a moment later, and she crashed into a strange wooden object.

"GuhhHhhhHh... what is this?" The brunette groaned, opening her eyes and examining the wood. She saw intricate patterns etched into it, and looked down and found herself on royal red sheets.

Before she could process what was happening, a black-clad figure crashed into her. "WHAT THE—AHHhhHHhH!"

The short-haired brunette involuntarily screeched when she saw Steve do a breathtaking triple axle through a spatial rift and land face-first on her breasts.

"GuuHHhHhhH…." Steve groaned, shaking his head in her cleavage while she lay frozen with a mortified blushing expression and her hand raised.

She stopped her possessed hand that compelled her to swat the man off her chest with 80 G's of force because she didn't want to accidentally break his neck.

More importantly, as she feared, a head with frizzy pink hair materialized from dead space like a glamorous version of a certain horror woman who crawls out of TV screens.

"YOU! YOU!" The malevolent spirit snapped, pointing at the two, "IF YOU DON'T GET OFF KAZEY'S BED RIGHT NOW, I'LL MURDER YOUR FAVORITE FOODS AND PUT KAT'S CASINO OUT OF FUCKING BUSINESS!"

Steve's fight-or-flight response triggered, and he immediately did a push-up, only to buckle slightly, as the area was squishy and unstable. "What the fuck is this?"

He looked down and saw Rein's face, shaded in crimson, with her mouth opened in shock.

"Rein! Did you get burned!?" Steve cried, "You look seriously—"

SLAP! CRASH!

The poor, ignorant Asian man flew across the room with extreme force, crashing into the wall behind the nightstand.

Rein immediately cupped her breasts with an embarrassed expression.

"Kiss him, kick him, kill him—do whatever the fuck you want, BUT GET THE FUCK OFF KAZEY'S BED!" Kiera yelled aggressively, "Otherwise, Steve'll get cucked by my fist!"

The brunette's fight-or-flight triggered next, and she jolted, falling off the bed and landing elbow-first on the embattled Asian man's face.

"S-Sorry!" Rein cried, crawling off the man who she had just elbow-dropped like a pro wrestler.

"GuHhhHhHh…." Steve groaned, "Apology tentatively accept—"

"KahHHHhH!" A sharp whine of a woman abruptly materialized as a blonde and curly-haired brunette crashed into the two of them.

Rein sat up and saw Layla's breasts smothering him and Moe's head in his crotch.

A primal anger heated within her body, and she crawled to the curly-haired brunette and grabbed the floozy, ripping her out from between his legs.

"KuHHhhHhh!" Aaron materialized with two others from thin air. The red-haired soldier flew into the posterboard, and Chen crashed onto Rein's back, sending her and the floozy crashing back into Steve.

The embattled Asian man clawed and gasped for breath. He didn't even know what was happening—he just wanted to live! From his perspective, survival didn't seem likely.

Luckily, the others didn't hit him. Renton crashed into the nightstand and rolled onto the bed, and Eric, Denzel, and Jackson landed on the foot of the bed.

Once Rein finished throwing floozies off her man and confirmed he was somehow still alive, she snapped out of her primal trance and looked at the people around her.

Most of the soldiers had third-degree burns, other than Eric and Layla. More importantly—

"A-Aaron!?" Rein muttered in shock, looking at the man, groaning and bleeding out of his eye, glass protruding from the socket.

A pissed-off pink-haired teen materialized and stomped to the bed.

"Kiera!" The short-haired brunette yelled.

"Priorities!" Kiera snapped, walking up to the scruffy man who had the audacity to pass out on Kaze's bed and rub his infected burns on the sheets.

Rein's eyes trembled. "Kiera! Aaron is—"

"PRIORITIES!" The teen yelled, grabbing the man by the collar and laying him on the ground with the maximum amount of force she could without threatening his life.

Then she finally addressed the other pleb on the bed—Aaron.

"God damn, bro." Kiera scoffed, using God's Eyes technique to assess his medical condition, "How did you get the one type of physical wound I'm SOL on fixing!?"

"This isn't funny, Kiera!" Rein snapped, "Pay—"

"Chill, Tsundere Bunny." The fiery teen snapped, "He's fine as long as he doesn't move… fuck. Whatevs."

She realized he was on Kaze's bed and couldn't move, making her cheek twitch. However, she moved her gaze to the buff black man on the ground.

"Look, this guy's gonna be a non-basted roast without carrots if we don't heal him." Kiera growled between her teeth, "So get over here and prepare to rip that bad luck charm out of his chest.

Once he's patched up, we can focus on carrot top."

Rein looked down and saw Steve giving her a weak smile that said, [don't worry, I'm just dying], and nodded, leaving him for dead. "I'm on my way!"

When she saw Denzel, she grimaced. "How are we going to save him? If we remove that thing, his lung will collapse, and he'll bleed out…."

A football-sized piece of glass—AKA a [bad luck charm]—was sticking out of his chest. Removing it could kill him.

"I'm starting Divine Stitches now." Kiera explained calmly, "Once I give the okay, you're gonna pull it out like a cheating husband on a business trip.

I'll begrudgingly patch his life back together after."

"How do you do that?" Rein muttered in disbelief, talking about her language, "Whatever, I got this."

The short-haired brunette gritted her teeth and grabbed onto the slippery blood-covered glass, preparing to pull.

Kiera waved her hand, and the man glowed with green light, and green wisps shot out of his wounds, with a large one moving from his chest.

Moe opened her eyes weekly, watching in a haze. "Is she stealing his soul? Wait, isn't that… that girl we saw?"

"Now!" The pink-haired teen yelled.

Rein grabbed the shard without reservation, letting it cut into her hands as she yanked up.

"KUhH!" Denzel coughed, shooting blood from his mouth.

"Don't you even THINK about dying when you're bleeding on Kazey's carpet!" Kiera snapped, seeing the green threads pale. She raised her foot and stomped on the man's kneecap.

"AGH!" The black man coughed as adrenaline and endorphins shot through his body.

While everyone was shocked at her action, the pale green wisps lit up like a Christmas tree temporarily. That was enough for her to grab one.

Moe could only watch in disbelief as blood and glass shards flowed out of his wounds, and clean blood flowed back in. An intricate pattern of Qi weaved back and forth as Denzel's body rebuilt itself. "What is… going on?"

"Listen up, pin cushion!" Kiera screamed, making the man's eyes open slightly, "I'm about to stitch that lung of yours, and I need you to hold your breath.

If you gasp like the waking dead with this much glass around you, you'll tear open again like a double-dipping virgin on prom night. Kapish?"

Denzel tried to laugh but coughed and nodded, holding his breath after.

Kiera closed her eyes and waved her hand, stitching the man's lung back together, and then pulled her hand back aggressively like a puppet master.

The black man's eyes shot open, and he summoned incredible willpower not to scream as glass shot out of his chest, exiting through uncut flesh. She needed it away from his lungs.

As it exited his skin, her golden eyes looked at him. "You can breathe now."

"GuHHhhuUuhh!" Denzel gasped, filling his lungs with air. He was in a lot of pain, but the option of breathing felt like a true miracle and pushed back his initial reluctance.

Kiera ignored his miraculous return and continued to work, pulling more glass out of his body, bit by bit. She didn't lose focus, working with a determination that everyone could only admire.

"Okay, look." She said to the buff black man, looking at his face, "I have no idea what you're about to experience, but I can say one thing for certain—it's gonna fucking suck.

So close your eyes and trust I'm not gonna turn you into leather face, kay?"

"Leather face!?" Denzel cried, "What are you going to do!?"

"Translation: Kiera's about to heal those third-degree burns on your face." Steve groaned, finally standing up, "She's pretty pissed off, so if you complain, she'll leave your face that way."

Denzel touched his face and winced, noticing for the first time. "Fuck me…."

"If anyone says anything sexual in this room, I'll kill you." Kiera said chillingly, tugging on the man's face with Qi and making him wince. She was still bitter about Martha, so she was abnormally sensitive.

Everyone shivered, staring at her bloodthirsty gaze. While normal people would be exaggerating, they knew she wasn't.

"Steve, get Marilyn." Kiera ordered, continuing, "Rein, take Aaron to Kazey for healing. But don't you dare tell Kazey's we're in his bedroom! I'll say sorry once I clean this mess up."

"Understood." Rein gulped nervously, turning to the Asian man, who nodded.

After the three left, the firey teen looked around the room, making eye contact with Eric, Layla, and Moe, who were awake.

"Listen up, party peoples." Kiera ordered, "My name is Kiera, and I'll be your physical-slash-plastic surgeon today. I've had a bad fucking week, so here's how this'll go down.

I'm gonna heal you to full health—you're going to enjoy full health. That's it—end of discussion—dunzo. No questions. No [thank you]s. Nothing.

Don't say a single fucking word, or I'll put that glass back into you.

And if you moan for any goddamn reason, I'll sew your eyes shut with Divine Stitches and release you into the training field for monster-shooting practice.

So make sure that groan is gruff, or shit'll get rough. Got it!?"

The people shuddered, confused why she would even consider why they might moan. However, they could see she wasn't playing around, so they nodded hesitantly and let her get to work.